I once read an article about how you always know your “firsts” but rarely know your “lasts.” So in these final few days of college, I have striven to soak in the moments of my lasts.
When I left the library on Tuesday, I had submitted my last final in my last class at Furman. It was a final paper on final research. It was due at 6pm, and I submitted it at the stroke of 6. I emailed it in, closed my laptop, gathered my belongings, and left the library for the last time.
When I left the library, I knew it was my last time in the library as a Furman student. The library was not my favorite place on campus, but it was a central location for me. It was fundamental to my essence of being a Furman student.
During my very first week at Furman, my freshman roommate Kelly and I ventured to the library. From the week one, I was a library studier. And for four years, I really only did my homework or studying in the library. Other people grew to love studying in classrooms, by the lake, in their living rooms. I stayed loyal to the library. I found my favorite section (on the top floor, in the middle, back by the windows.) I found my favorite time to study in the library (mornings, when it’s quiet and finding a table is less competitive.) I had my sweet friends, who also loved the library and sat with me often (in fact, nearly every time I was in the library, my friend Katie was too.) For its predictable familiarity of peaceful, quiet study, for the social front section, and for the free printing, I loved the library.
And so, when I left the library, I knew that it was, essentially, the end for me as an academic Furman student. I had completed my classes, finals, homework…everything. I have no reason to return to the library. I thought of the hours upon hours that I have spent in that library. I thought of the conversations I have had in the library, some light and happy; some weary of work and full of frustration; and some of great depth and meaning.
I have always attached a lot of meaning to places, and specifically to rooms. I remember thinking very distinctly when I moved into my apartment in North Village this year, that the room I was moving into was probably the place where I would be when I made my decision about graduate school. It was where I would get ready for my last ADPi formal. It was where I will get dressed for graduation on Saturday.
When I left the library, I thought of all the moments: fears, frustrations, and most importantly, friendships, which were facilitated through this place that I will probably never enter again. When I left the library, I cried, because I thought of all that it has brought me, and all that I will miss about it. So to all of you current and future Furman students, I encourage you: to love the library, and to use it well.